|fuck you, read this
||[Apr. 1st, 2005|02:55 pm]
GNAA releases surprising new Easter research|
Gay Nigger Zombie Jesus rises from the Grave to kill Jews
JERUSALEM, ISRAEL (Al Jazeera) - Just in time for the Easter season this year, GNAA historical researcher malaclypse (Th.D., Doctorate of Divinity) has released a surprising and vastly different picture of the last days of Jesus Christ.
In a release of his paper, apparently written on the skin of Jewish newborns, malaclypse discusses his findings with the world. The following are several of the more interesting excerpts:
"As many of you know, Jesus was a black man. But my research has uncovered facts that have been hidden from us by the Zionists, Jewish Cabal, and the Catholic Church for milennia. Jesus was a Gay Nigger, here to spread the "Word of the Lord" (Gay Nigger Seed) to the common people of the time. He didn't heal people of leperosy, he healed their syphilis, and "healed" blindness (caused by glaucomas) by gving out "weed" (marijuana) to the afflicted.
The Jews, who had managed to gain control of the government at the time (having not yet learned to hide their manipulations in the shadows) feared the exponential viral spread of the Holy Seed and decided that Jesus would have to be crucified. He was betrayed by Judas (obviously a white Jew) and sold to the Romans for 30 pieces of silver, one of the earliest documented examples of the Jewish love for money over all else. He was then crucified, crying out to his father and his homeboys to forgive the people whom he anally loved for not saving him.
Jesus waas then placed in a cave, where over the next few days, the Holy Seed worked a miracle upon his tortured body. He arose from the dead, his body well-formed and glistening with sweat, wielding a massive erection and unsatiable lust for revenge upon those who killed him. Yes, Gay Nigger Zombie Jesus had risen from the dead."
"... [he] moved calmly among the crowds of people, seeking to feast upon the brains of the Jews who hd killed him. After every Jew he killed, he was able to deliver the holy seed to another follower, ensuring the spread of Gay Niggerhood throughout the world, even if he were to be killed again. He was quoted as saying "Arrrrrrgggghh... Jewbrainssssssss" as he wandered the earth, searching for revenge. After killing untold thousands of Jews and spreading the Holy Seed widely among the people, he was killed for the last time. The Jews slowed him down by throwing razor-sharp Stars of David at him, felled him with lances made from the bones of dead Niggers, tied him with ropes soaked in the menstural blood of virgin Jewish women, and finally burned him, pouring naptha and pitch onto the conflaguration until only ashes remained.
The lack of any solid remains, however, is not truly indicative of his utter destruction, but shows that his Father, the Lord, took him bodily up into heaven, burned and maimed, to recover and bide his time until the Second Coming [properly spelled Cumming] when he will return to Earth and kill Jews until the rivers run red with their filthy blood. The faithful will receive the Holy Seed from his glistening shaft, and be assured their place in the Gay Nigger Heaven, were the soap is always dropped in the showers, the assholes are all pink and clean, and the screams of the Jews burning in hell can be heard on the radio whenever you desire."
The Catholic Church, which has been a front for the Jewish Cabal since its inception, has been hiding these documents, keeping them from the public to appease the Jewish masters that they think hold the power of life and death over all the world. Expending a great amount of effort, spending untold sums of money on bribes, and after immense amounts of anal sex, malaclypse was able to access these documents, copies of which were protected by the hidden Ordo GayNig within the church, and bring his findings to the world. "With this," malaclypse commented, "the orld finally knows the truth of what happened to Christ, and what awaits those who don't accept the Holy Seed and the teachings of the GNAA (the Church of Gay Nigger Jesus) when the day of Judgement comes.